Broken Glass

I’m feeling very broken today.
I had my interview for the social anxiety group this morning. It probably went as expected but it’s still a stab every time I discuss the extent of my disorder. It was recommended that seek more in depth care for my BPD. Being pregnant has thrown a wrench in my treatment plan, I’ve got to seek other therapies now that medication is out of the picture. 
I’m trying to remember this is a process but today my brain is all drink copious amounts of coffee while sitting on the porch smoking. Except it’s all bad for baby. This little miracle. Well today it’s not feeling very miraculous. 

So I’m just going to sit downtown with my decaf watching the world go by until it’s time for my next therapy appointment this afternoon. Maybe my therapist will offer some duct tape for all these new cracks. 

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